Remembering Daniel Ivey

I am writing this story for my dad, Daniel Ivey. My name is Michelle and I was a daddy’s girl that’s for sure. Being an only child, I got to spend a lot of time with my dad growing up. I have fond memories of going for drives with my dad to just about anywhere, my favourite memory being the time we drove from Calgary to Vancouver through the Rockies in 1986 on our way to Expo’86. My dad loved going for drives. We ate a lot of cherries on that trip and every time I eat them, I think of us sharing a big bag of cherries on our venture.

In April of this year (2007), my dad developed a sudden pain in his abdomen. He waited a few days to see if it would pass but it didn’t, it only got worst. He must off gone to the Emergency Room about 10 times between April and August and also a trip to his Doctor. The pain was so bad and my dad was losing weight and looking paler everyday. They started off with the obvious tests… X-rays, colonoscopy, endoscope, ultrasound etc. and everything came back fine. Every time he came home, he would come with another prescription for another painkiller but still no diagnosis. Finally, one day in July he went to the hospital once again with excruciating abdominal pain. The doctor working that day mentioned a possible tumour on his pancreas. Until that day, I had never really heard or new much about Pancreatic Cancer. Little did I know how much my world was about to change. A few days later he was at the hospital having a CAT scan and later that afternoon, the Doctor who he had seen in the Emergency Room phoned him and told him to come to the office and he could bring someone if he wanted to. My dad being my dad didn’t want to bother me at work so he went alone and waited for me to get home to tell me the news. There was a tumour on his pancreas and they had diagnosed him with Pancreatic Cancer. They booked him for an MRI for staging of the tumour. I prayed like you wouldn’t believe in those days leading up to his MRI. After my dad’s MRI, the Doctor who ordered it phoned him at home to say the radiologist could find nothing on his pancreas. They said that there was some fluid in his abdomen but his pancreas appeared to be fine and it was most likely not pancreatic cancer. The Doctor said that he would have to go for more tests, and have a biopsy of the fluid to determine the cause of his pain. We were so relieved! By this time, we had both been online reading about pancreatic cancer and didn’t like what we had read. I actually said to him that it was so good that it was not his pancreas and that we could handle anything as long as it wasn’t pancreatic cancer. He agreed.

A few more weeks went by as we waited for his appointment for his biopsy. As time went by, dad got worst and worst and could no longer go to work. His stomach filled with fluid (called Ascites) and the Emergency Room even sent him home one day saying it was only “Gas”. I am not a doctor but I knew enough to know that his belly wasn’t swollen due to gas. The following week, I took dad to see his own Doctor. Before we left, he packed his bags because we both knew that his Doctor would have to admit him. He was so swollen; he could barely move and was in so much pain. Sure enough, he was admitted to the hospital and one week later we had the results of the biopsy. Dad had pancreatic cancer. What a blow it was. First thinking he did have it, then being relieved that he didn’t have it and now, it is confirmed – My dad had pancreatic cancer.

In the next 6 weeks, dad went through a lot. It took a lot to get his pain under control and he had to be drained several times due to the build up of fluid in his abdomen. He tried Chemo but it made him too sick. We all knew it was not good, but we chose to stay positive and not give up. I spent a lot of time with my dad in those 6 weeks. I took a leave from work so I could be there with him. I was there for every meal and we had some great chats during his time he had left, although we never talked about him dying.

On October 14th 2007, my dad passed away. He had had a real good week the week before and he was doing so well, I actually thought maybe he was going to live longer than anticipated. It was a Wednesday afternoon that my dad suddenly fell real ill. I remember being at home for a rest and the phone rang and it was the hospital calling to tell me how sick he was. I thought this can’t be right; I just left there a few hours ago. 3 days later he lost his battle with Pancreatic Cancer. I was with him until the end and I never gave up hope.

My father was a great dad. He loved going for drives, he loved listening to music, he loved cooking different foods, he was a dedicated employee never missing anytime from work until his illness. He was a very intelligent man. He could watch the game show “Jeopardy” and would know every answer to every question. He was full of knowledge and in those final days, I really appreciated everything my dad had taught me.

Anytime I had a question or didn’t believe what someone had told me about some fact…I would call on my dad because he always had the answers. It is so unfortunate that he will not be here to enjoy grandchildren and teach them everything he taught me. There will always be something missing in my life. He would want more awareness and attention given to this horrible disease so I vow to educate as many people as possible about Pancreatic Cancer.